Subject: King Of The Jungle
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Sun Jun 23 2002 - 10:09:30 EDT
"King Of The Jungle"
A lion wakes up one morning feeling really
rowdy and mean. He goes out and corners
a small monkey and roars, "Who is mightiest
of all jungle animals?"
The trembling monkey says, "You are, mighty
lion!"
Later, the lion confronts a wild beast and
fiercely bellows, "Who is the mightiest of all
jungle animals?"
The terrified wild beast stammers, "Oh great
lion, you are by far the mightiest animal in the
jungle!"
On a roll now, the lion swaggers up to an
elephant and roars, "Who is the mightiest
of all jungle animals?"
Fast as lightning, the elephant snatches up
the lion with his trunk and slams him against
a tree half a dozen times. The elephant then
stomps on the lion, and then ambles away.
The lion lets out a moan of pain, lifts his head
weakly and hollers after the elephant, "Geez,
just because you don't know the answer, you
don't have to get so upset about it!"
***********************
"I Wanna Be A Bear"
If you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do
nothing but sleep for six months.
I could deal with that.
Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat
yourself stupid.
I could deal with that, too.
If you're a mama bear, everyone knows you
mean business. You swat anyone who bothers
your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat
them too.
I could deal with that.
If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to
wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will
have hairy legs and excess body fat.
Yup.....
I wanna be a bear.
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