Subject: Military Comparisons
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Tue Aug 20 2002 - 07:15:36 EDT
"Military Comparisons"
An Army grunt stands in the rain with a 35 lb.
pack on his back, 15-lb. weapon in hand, after
having marched 12-miles, and says, "This is
crap."
An Army Airborne Ranger stands in the rain
with a 45-lb. pack on his back weapon in hand,
after having jumped from an airplane and
marched 18-miles, and says with a smile, "This
is good crap!"
A Navy Seal lies in the mud, 55-lb pack on his
back, weapon in hand, after swimming 10-miles
to shore, crawling through a swamp and marching
25-miles at night past the enemy positions, says
with a grin, "This really is great crap."
A Marine, up to his nose in the stinking, bug-infested
mud of a swamp with a 65-lb pack on his back and
a weapon in both hands after jumping from an
aircraft at high altitude, into the ocean, swimming
12-miles to the shore, killing several alligators to
enter the swamp, then crawling 30-miles through
the brush to assault an enemy camp, says, "I love
this crap!"
An Air Force officer sits in an easy chair in his air
conditioned, carpeted VIP room and says, "The
cable's out? What kind of crap is this?"
**************************
"Ace Pilot"
Zack volunteered for military service during WWII.
He had such a high aptitude for aviation that he
was sent right to Pensacola skipping boot camp.
The very first day at Pensacola he solos and is
the best flier on the base.
All they could do was give him his gold wings and
assign him immediately to an aircraft carrier in the
Pacific.
On his first day aboard he took off and single-
handedly shot down 6 Japanese Zeros. Then
climbing up to 20,000 feet he found 10 more
Japanese plans and shot them all down, too.
Noting that his fuel was getting low, he descended,
circled the carrier and came in for a perfect landing
on the deck. He threw back the canopy, climbed
out and jogged over to the Captain.
Saluting smartly, he said, "Well, Sir, how did I do
on my very first day?"
The Captain replied, "You make one velly impoltant
mistake!!"
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