How To Speak About Men


Subject: How To Speak About Men
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Thu Nov 29 2001 - 07:25:58 EST


"HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN and be
POLITICALLY CORRECT"

He does not have a BEER GUT
- He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE
FACILITY

He is not a BAD DANCER
- He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN

He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME
- He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS

He is not BALDING
- He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION

He is not a CRADLE ROBBER
- He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL
RELATIONSHIPS

He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK
He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL

He does not act like a TOTAL ASS
- He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL
INVERSION

He is not a SEX MACHINE
- He is ROMANTICALLY AUTOMATED

He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG
- He has SWINE EMPATHY

He is not afraid of COMMITMENT
- He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED

He does not UNDRESS YOU WITH HIS EYES
- He has an INTROSPECTIVE GRAPHIC
MOMENTS



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