Subject: Sex Caloric Guide
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Wed Nov 14 2001 - 09:32:59 EST
"Sex Caloric Guide"
It has been known for many years that sex
is good exercise, but until recently nobody
had made a scientific study of the caloric
expenditure of different sexual activities.
Now, after original and proprietary research
they are proud to present the results.
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent....................... 12 Calories
Without her consent.................... 187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands........................ 8 Calories
With one hand.......................... 12 Calories
With your teeth........................ 85 Calories
PUTTING ON A PRESERVATIVE:
With an erection....................... 6 Calories
Without an erection.................... 315 Calories
PRELIMINARIES:
Trying to find the clitoris............ 8 Calories
Trying to find the G-Spot.............. 92 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary............................. 12 Calories
69 lying down.......................... 78 Calories
69 standing up......................... 112 Calories
Wheelbarrow............................ 216 Calories
Doggy Style............................ 326 Calories
Italian chandelier..................... 912 Calories
ORGASMING:
Real................................... 112 Calories
False.................................. 315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging................... 18 Calories
Getting up immediately................. 36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately......
816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years old........................ 36 Calories
30-39 years............................ 80 Calories
40-49 years............................ 124 Calories
50-59 years............................ 972 Calories
60-69 years............................ 2916 Calories
70 and over......................... Results are still
pending
DRESSING UP AFTERWARDS:
Calmly................................. 32 Calories
In a hurry............................. 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door...
1218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door....
3521 Calories
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