..if THEY Had A Jewish Mother


Subject: ..if THEY Had A Jewish Mother
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Thu Jan 11 2001 - 16:26:46 EST


"..if THEY Had A Jewish Mother"

MONA LISA'S MOTHER: "After all that money
your father and I spent on braces, that's the
biggest smile you can give us?"

COLUMBUS' MOTHER: "I don't care what
you've discovered, you still could have written!"

MICHELANGELO'S MOTHER: "Can't you paint
on walls like other children? Do you have any
idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?"

NAPOLEON'S MOTHER: "All right, if you aren't
hiding your report card inside your jacket, take
your hand out of there and show me."

ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S MOTHER: "Again with
the stovepipe hat? Can't you just wear a baseball
cap like the other kids?"

MARY'S MOTHER: "I'm not upset that your lamb
followed you to school, but I would like to know
how he got a better grade than you."

ALBERT EINSTEIN'S MOTHER: "But it's your
senior picture. Can't you do something about
your hair? Styling gel, mousse, something...?"

GEORGE WASHINGTON'S MOTHER: "The
next time I catch you throwing money across
the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance
good-bye!"

JONAH'S MOTHER: "That's a nice story. Now
tell me where you've really been for the last forty
years."

THOMAS EDISON'S MOTHER: "Of course I'm
proud that you invented the electric light bulb.
Now turn it off and get to bed!"

PAUL REVERE'S MOTHER: "I don't care where
you think you have to go, young man, midnight
is past your curfew."



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