Subject: Hanukkah Song
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Sun Dec 09 2001 - 03:04:27 EST
"Why Hanukkah Is Better Than Christmas"
10. There's no "Kathy Lee Gifford Special"
9. Eight days of presents!
8. No need to clean the chimney.
7. There's no latke-nog.
6. Burl Ives doesn't sing Hanukkah songs.
5. You won't be pressured to buy Hanukkah Seals.
4. You won't see, "You're a Putz, Charlie Brown."
3. No barking dog version of "I had a Little Dreidl."
2. No pine needles to vacuum up afterwards.
1. Latkes are cheaper to mail than fruitcakes.
*************************
"Hanukkah Song"
Copyright @ 1998 Erik D. Freeman
efreem2@alumni.umbc.edu
Intro by author: This is a song, that uh, there's
a lot of Xmas songs out there, but not too many
about Hanukkah, so I wrote a song for all those
nice little Jewish kids who don't get to hear any
Hanukkah songs--here we go...
Put on your yarmulke, here comes Hanukkah
It's so much fun-akkah to celebrate Hanukkah,
Hanukkah is the Festival of Lights,
Instead of one day of presents, we have eight
crazy nights.
When you feel like the only kid in town with out
a Xmas tree,
Here's a list of people who are Jewish, just like
you and me:
David Lee Roth lights the menorah,
So do James Caan, Kirk Douglas, and the late
Dinah Shore-ah
Guess who eats together at the Karnickey Deli,
Bowzer from Sha-na-na, and Arthur Fonzerrelli.
Paul Newman's half Jewish; Goldie Hawn's half, too,
Put them together--what a fine lookin' Jew!
You don't need 'Deck the Halls' or 'Jingle Bell Rock'
Cause you can spin the dreidl with Captain Kirk and
Mr. Spock -- both Jewish!
Put on your yarmulkes, it's time for Hanukkah,
The owner of the Seattle Supersonic-ahs celebrates
Hanukkah.
O.J. Simpson-- not a Jew!
But guess who is...Hall of Famer--Rod Carew--
(he converted!)
We got Ann Landers and her sister Dear Abby,
Harrison Ford's a quarter Jewish-- not too shabby!
Some people think that Ebeneezer Scrooge is,
Well, he's not, but guess who is: All three stooges.
So many Jews are in show biz--
Tom Cruise isn't, but I heard his agent is.
Tell your friend Veronica, it's time you celebrate
Hanukkah,
I hope I get a harmonica, on this lovely, lovely
Hanukkah.
So drink your gin-and-tonic-ah,
and smoke your marajuanic-ah,
If you really, really wanna-kah,
Have a happy, happy, happy, happy Hanukkah.
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