Subject: The Gold Watch
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Thu May 11 2000 - 22:09:09 EDT
"Park Avenue"
Arriving back in Manhattan after a summer in
Vermont takes some getting used to.
I was walking from Park Avenue to Madison the
first hour of my return when I noticed a woman
walking cautiously and apparently painfully. The
woman was wearing thongs, her black patent
pumps held high in one hand and her other
hand outstretched for balance.
"You poor thing, your feet must really hurt," I
said as she was about to pass me.
The woman was indignant.
"Wet toenails," she said tersely.
***********************************************
"The Gold Watch"
A judge was instructing the jury that a witness
was not necessarily to be regarded as untruthful
because he changed his statement after he
gave it to the police.
"For example," he said, "when I entered my
chambers today, I was positive that I had my
gold watch in my pocket. But then I remembered
that I left in on my nightstand in my bedroom."
When the judge returned home that evening, his
wife asked him "Why so much urgency for your
watch? Isn't sending three men to pick it up for
you a bit extreme?"
"What?" said the judge, "I didn't send anyone for
my watch, let alone three people. What did you
do?"
"I gave it to the first one," said the wife, "he knew
exactly where it was."
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