Subject: Christmas Q & A
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Sat Jan 29 2000 - 03:45:26 EST
"Christmas Q & A"
Who brings the Christmas presents to police stations?
Santa Clues.
What's red and white and falls down the chimney?
Santa Klutz!!!!
If athletes get athlete's foot, then what do astronauts get?
Missile toe.
Why is it so cold at Christmas?
It's in Decembrrrrr.
What does Rudolph want for Christmas?
A pony sleigh station
What do elves learn in school?
The Elf-abet!
What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish.
Why did the elf push his bed into the fireplace?
He wanted to sleep like a log.
Why does Scrooge love Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?
Because every buck is dear to him.
What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Snowflakes.
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
Claustrophobic.
Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on
Christmas Eve?
Because it soots him.
Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
So he can ho-ho-ho.
Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
Because he had low elf esteem.
What do you call Santa's helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.
What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas time?
Sandy Claus!
How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
Fleece Navidad!
What do you get when you cross a snowman
with a vampire?
Frostbite.
What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?
Crisp Cringle.
What is the Christmas message in these letters?
ABCDEFGHIJKMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ?
No "L" (Noel)
How come you never hear anything about the
10th reindeer 'Olive'?
Olive?
Yeah, you know, "Olive, the other reindeer
used to laugh and call him names..."
Why do birds fly south for the winter?
Because it's too far to walk.
Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
You do all the work, and the fat guy with the
suit gets all the credit.
What is THE main reason Santa is so jolly?
Because he knows where all the naughty
girls live.
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