Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Wed, 19 May 1999 22:04:02 -0400
"Two Blond Pilots"
Two blond guys were sitting around talking. After
awhile, first blond looks at the second blonde and
says, "Hey, you want to go up for a ride in my
airplane?"
The second guy says, "Wow, you have an airplane?
Let's go!"
So they go for a tour around the city in the plane.
Eventually they run low on fuel and need to land.
The blond pilot starts circling around looking for a
place to land. He sees an airstrip close by. He
says his new buddy along for the ride, "Let's land
here. It looks like it's as good a place as any."
So he circles around and goes in for a landing, but
at the last minute he swerves and pulls back up. "
Damn!" he says, "That is the SHORTEST runway
I have ever seen! How is anyone supposed to land
on it?"
Since it's the only runway nearby, he decides to try
again, with the same result.
Getting pretty irritated, the pilot says to his friend,
"All right, I'm going to try ONE more time, and if I
can't land it we're just going to crash and hope we
don't die."
So they end up crashing, and, miraculously, neither
one is hurt.
When they crawl out of the wreckage, the first guy
is swearing and gesticulates wildly at the runway.
"I'm gonna find whoever designed this crazy runway
and wring his neck! He must be total moron! No
one could land on anything that short!"
The second guy looks around and says, "Yeah,
but look how *wide* it is!"
***********************************************************
"The Blonde Airline Stewardess"
An airline captain was breaking in a very pretty
new blonde stewardess. The route they were
flying had a stay-over in another city, so upon
their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess
the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop
and stay overnight.
The next morning as the pilot was preparing the
crew for the day's route, he noticed the new
stewardess was missing. He knew which room
she was in at the hotel and called her up
wondering what happened to her. She answered
the phone, sobbing, and said she couldn't get
out of her room.
"You can't get out of your room?" the captain
asked, "Why not?"
The stewardess replied: "There are only three
doors in here," she cried, "one is the bathroom,
one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that
says, 'Do Not Disturb'!"
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.0b3 on Thu May 20 1999 - 09:00:02 EDT