Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Sat, 15 May 1999 13:42:28 -0400
The sender of this joke wrote, "Maybe you need
to live in timber country to fully appreciate this one."
Gee, I wouldn't know. I'm a city gal.
LadyHawke
~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Timber!"
A lady from California purchased a piece of timber
land in Oregon. There was a large tree on one of the
highest points in the tract. She wanted to get a good
view of her land so she started to climb the big tree.
As she neared the top, she encountered a spotted
owl that attacked her.
In her haste to escape, the lady slid down the tree to
the ground and got many splinters in her private parts.
In considerable pain, she hurried to the nearest doctor.
He listened to her story then told her to go into the
examining room and he would see if he could help
her. She sat and waited for three hours before the
doctor reappeared.
The angry lady demanded, " What took you so long?"
The unperturbed doctor replied, "Well, I had to get
permits from the Environmental Protection Agency,
the Forest Service, and the Bureau of Land
Management before I could remove old-growth
timber from a recreational area."
************************************************************
"Female Punk Rocker"
A nurse from England was on duty in the emergency
department when a punk rocker entered. This young
woman had purple hair styled into a mohawk, a variety
of tattoos and strange clothing. It was determined that
the patient had acute appendicitis and she was
scheduled for an immediate surgery.
When she was completely disrobed on the operating
table, the staff found that her pubic hair had been dyed
green and above it was a tattoo reading:
"Keep off the grass."
After the prep and the surgery, the surgeon added a
small note to the dressing, which said:
"Sorry, had to mow the lawn."
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.0b3 on Sun May 16 1999 - 09:00:01 EDT