Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Tue, 11 May 1999 19:07:23 -0400
LadyHawke's Reflection du Jour, Hawke-mobile, part I
{Copyright 1999, Irene A Mystery}
The Hawke-mobile, as one of my friends/subscribers
dubbed it, was getting up there in years. It had to be
replaced a long time ago. However, I liked the comfort
of a big car so I held on to it for dear life. Buick Park
Avenue suited me just fine, even if it was over 10 years
old.
"Why do you drive such a big thing? Don't you like the
new sleek more aerodynamic models?" my friends
would ask. Nope. After one near-fatal accident, in
which I totaled my Buick Skyhawk and send a heavy
station wagon airborne for 20 yards, I would not get into
a small car. Small cars look like boxes to me. And if
one gets into an accident in a small box, one could go
straight to another box - the one that goes 6 feet under.
The day of the accident was actually pretty unremarkable.
I was going back to the office after a meeting at another
location during my IBM years. My brand new (!) front tire
blew up as I made a turn into an overpass, and my car
turned 90 degrees. If that station wagon wasn't there
to absorb the shock of my first impact, I would have
"flown" right through the railing to the highway below the
overpass, and you wouldn't be enjoying Joke du Jour
today. As is, I was told, the view of the harmonica-like
hood of my car, half-gone through the railing, cased a
major traffic back up below. Of course, I never saw that...
How frail a life is... How quickly it can change in bare
seconds... Thanks to seat belts, I am alive and well today.
{To be concluded tomorrow.}
LadyHawke
~*~*~*~*~*~*
"New Car"
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile
dealership to pick up our car, we were told that the
keys had been accidentally locked in it.
We went to the service department and found a
mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's
side door. As I watched from the passenger's side,
I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered
it was open.
"Look," I announced to the technician, "It's open!"
"Oh, I know," answered the young man, concentrating
furiously. "I already got THAT side."
***********************************************************
"Car Humor"
* Hopefully, the price of new cars has peaked.
Good thing too. I mean most dealers have a
showroom and a recovery room as it is.
* For an auto mechanic, frustration is having a
pound of grease on both hands and no upholstery
to wipe them on.
* I think a lot of trouble with the new cars is the
bucket seats -- not everyone has the same
size bucket.
* You can tell the Japanese economy is suffering
just by their new cars. My neighbor bought one.
The first time he washed it, it shrunk from
midsize to compact.
* My neighbor bought the car in the first place
because of the huge rebates offered. The car is
pretty smooth, but the rebate check keeps bouncing.
* You can often get a good price on a car with one
of those "Take over the payments" ads you see in
the newspapers. Only problem is most of them are
1980s models.
* I guess the biggest problem I face with both my
Mazda and Mrs Jim Jr aging is getting the car
started in the morning, and her started at night.
* I don't see the sense of increasing horsepower
and top speed in the new cars with traffic the way
it is. The other week on an Interstate highway, I
had to leave the car twice to make payments.
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.0b3 on Wed May 12 1999 - 09:00:02 EDT