Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Tue, 04 May 1999 08:56:26 -0400
"Cross-eyed Dog"
A man took his Rottweiler to the vet and said to him,
"My dog?s cross-eyed. Is there anything you can do for it?"
"Well" said the vet "let's have a look at him"
So he picks the dog up by the ears and has a good look
at its eyes.
"Well," says the vet "I'm going to have to put him down."
"Just because he's cross-eyed?" say's the man.
"No, because he's heavy." says the vet.
***********************************************************
"The Vet And The MD"
A Veterinarian was feeling ill and went to see his
doctor. The doctor asked him all the usual
questions, about symptoms, how long had they
been occurring, etc., when he interrupted him:
"Hey look, I'm a vet - *I* don't need to ask my
patients these kind of questions: I can tell what's
wrong just by looking." He smugly added,
"Why can't you?"
The doctor nodded, stood back, looked him up
and down, quickly wrote out a prescription,
handed it to him and said,
"There you are. Of course, if *that* doesn't work,
we'll have to have you put to sleep."
***********************************************************
"Country Solutions"
Dr. Cutter is the local Veterinarian, known for his
wry humor. He surpassed himself one summer
day when a city dog was brought to him after an
encounter with a porcupine.
After almost an hour of prying, pulling, cutting and
stitching, he returned the dog to its owner, who
asked what she owed.
"Thirty dollars, Ma'am," he answered.
"Why that's simply outrageous!" she stormed.
"That's what's wrong with you Maine people,
you're always trying to over charge summer
visitors. Whatever do you do in the winter, when
we're not being gypped here?"
"Raise porcupines, Ma'am."
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.0b3 on Tue May 04 1999 - 09:00:03 EDT