Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Tue, 08 Jun 1999 10:10:02 -0400
"Doctor, Don't Laugh!"
A man goes to the doctors and says, "Doctor, I've
got this problem you see, only you've got to promise
not to laugh".
The doctor replies, "Of course I won't laugh! That
would be thoroughly unprofessional. In over twenty
years of being a doctor I've never laughed at a patient."
"OK then," says the man, and he drops his trousers.
The doctor is greeted by the sight of the tiniest penis
he has ever seen in his life.
Despite his best efforts, he begins laughing, softly at
first, then uncontrollably. Several minutes later he
manages to compose himself and wipes the tears
from his eyes. "I'm so sorry," he says to the patient,
"I don't know what came over me, I won't let it
happen again. Now what seems to be the problem?
The man looks up at the doctor with sad eyes and says,
"It's swollen."
************************************************************
"Are You Stressed?"
aka "Orange Penis"
A guy goes to a doctor and says, "Doc, you've got to
help me. My penis is orange."
The doctor pauses to think and asks the guy to drop
his pants so he can check. Damned if the guy's
penis isn't orange! Doc tells the guy, "This is very
strange. Sometimes things like this are caused by
a lot of stress in a person's life."
Probing as to the causes of possible stress, the doc
asks the guy, "How are things going at work?"
The guy responds that he was fired about six weeks
ago. The doctor tells him that this must be the cause
of the stress. The guy responds, "No. The boss was
a real butthole, I had to work 20-30 hours of overtime
every week and I had no say in anything that was
happening. I found a new job a couple of weeks ago
where I can set my own hours, I'm getting paid
double what I got on the old job, and the boss is a
really great guy."
So the doc figures this isn't the reason. He asks the
guy, "How's your home life?" The guy says, "Well,
I got divorced about eight months ago."
The doc figures that this has got to be the reason for
all of the guys stress.
But the guy says, "No. For years, all I listened to was
nag, nag, nag. Darn, am I glad to be rid of that old bitch!"
So the doc takes a few minutes to think a little longer.
He inquires, "Do you have any hobbies or a social life?"
The guy replies, "No, not really. Most nights I just sit
at home, watch some porno flicks and munch on
Cheetos!!"
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.0b3 on Wed Jun 09 1999 - 09:00:02 EDT