Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Mon, 22 Feb 1999 12:50:05 -0500
Well, better later than never... To my Asian friends and
Subscribers, Happy New Year!
"Gung Hay Fat Choy," "Kung Hsi Fa Tsai," "Kung Ho Hsin
Hsi," "Hsin Nien Kuai Le," "San Ni Fei Lo" and "Chuc Mung
Nam Moi" (Oy, this was hard to type up!) Happiness and
Prosperity to All!
It's the Year of the Hare! Shall we all hop along?
LadyHawke
~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Fluffy, The Bunny Rabbit"
A woman walks into a veterinarian's waiting room.
She's dragging a wet rabbit on a leash. The rabbit
does not want to be there.
"Sit, Fluffy," she says. Fluffy glares at her, and sopping
wet, jumps up on another customer's lap, getting water
all over him.
"I said sit, now there's a good Fluffy," says the woman,
slightly embarrassed.
Fluffy, wet already, squats in the middle of the room and
urinates. The woman, mortally embarrassed, shouts,
"Darn it, Fluffy, will you be good?!"
Fluffy then starts a fight with a Doberman and pursues
it out of the office.
As the woman leaves to go after it, she turns to the rest
of the flabbergasted customers and says:
"Pardon me, I've just washed my hare, and can't do a
thing with it!"
***********************************************************
"The "Hare" Spray?"
A man was driving along the highway, and saw a
rabbit hopping across the middle of the road. He
swerved to avoid hitting the rabbit, but unfortunately
the rabbit jumped in front of the car and was hit. The
driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal
lover, pulled over to the side of the road and got out
to see what had become of the rabbit. Much to his
dismay, the rabbit was dead. The driver felt so awful,
he began to cry.
A woman driving down the highway saw the man
crying on the side of the road and pulled over. She
stepped out of her car and asked the man what was
wrong.
"I feel terrible," he explained. "I accidentally hit this
rabbit and killed it."
The woman told the man not to worry. She knew what
to do. She went to her car trunk and pulled out a spray
can. She walked over to the limp, dead rabbit, and
sprayed the contents of the can onto the rabbit.
Miraculously, the rabbit came to life, jumped up, waved
its paw at the two humans and hopped down the road.
50 feet away the rabbit stopped, turned around, waved
at the two again, hopped down the road another 50 feet,
turned, waved, and hopped another 50 feet.
The man was astonished. He couldn't figure out what
substance could be in the woman's spray can! He ran
over to the woman and demanded, "What was in your
spray can? What did you spray onto that rabbit?"
The woman turned the can around so that the man could
read the label. It said:
"'Hair Spray' Restores Life to Dead Hair. Adds
Permanent Wave."
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.0b3 on Tue Feb 23 1999 - 09:00:08 EST