A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation
was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments
and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of
this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do
to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out
of the office?"
"I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill."
The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try. The next day,
still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills. When he
went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.
************************************************************
"Priorities"
A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came
along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police
arrived at the scene, the lawyer was hopping up and down with
rage, complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW.
"Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer!!!" he shrieked.
"You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!!!" retorted
the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you
didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!!!"
"Oh no...." replied the lawyer, looking down and noticing for
the first time the bloody stump where his left arm had once been.
"Where's my Rolex???"