Pineapple Cookies

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                            FOOD FUNNY
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Thanks to Norma James, the first of many to send me the following:

Christmas Cookies

1 cup water
1 tsp. baking soda
1 cup sugar
1 tsp. salt
1 cup brown sugar
lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups dried fruit
1 bottle vodka

Sample the vodka to check quality. Take a large bowl. Check
the vodka again, to be sure it is of the highest quality. Pour 1
level cup and drink. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat 1 cup butter
in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of sugar, beat again. At
this point it's best to make sure the vodka is still OK, try another
cup, just in case. Turn off the mixerer thingy, break 2 leggs and
add to the bowl and chuck in 1 cup of dried fruit. Pick the frigging
fruit off the floor... mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck
in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the
vodka to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift 2 cups of salt or something.
Check the vodka. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
Add 1 table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you
can find. Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try
not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw
the bowl through the window, finish the vodka and make sure to
put the stove in the dishwasher. CHERRY MISTMAS!

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                            TODAY'S RECIPE
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I like these cookies, another recipe from my mother's collection,
because I love pineapple and you don't often run across it in cookies.

Pineapple Cookies

1 1/2 cups (375 ml) sugar
1 cup (250 ml) butter or vegetable shortening
1 egg
1 cup (250 ml) crushed pineapple and its juice
3 1/2 cups (875 ml) all-purpose flour
1 tsp (5 ml) baking soda
1 tsp (5 ml) salt
1/2 tsp (2 ml) ground nutmeg
1/2 cup (125 ml) chopped walnuts, pecans, or nuts of your choice

Beat the sugar, butter, and egg until thoroughly combined. Stir in
the pineapple and its juice. Sift the flour, baking soda, salt, and
nutmeg together and stir into the sugar mixture. Stir in the nuts
and chill in the refrigerator for 1 hour. Drop by teaspoonfuls about
2 inches (5 ml) apart on a lightly greased baking sheet and bake
in a preheated 400F (200C) oven just until set, 8 to 10 minutes.
Makes about 6 dozen.
Received on Fri Dec 24 07:49:28 2010