Fussy French Sweetbreads

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             FOOD FUNNY
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Jean Turner writes, "First, let me assure you that this is NOT a true
food funny, at least for me, but I thought it was good for a chuckle."

Very quietly, a woman confided to her husband on the eve of their 50th
anniversary that she was having an affair. Her husband turned to her and
asked, "Are you having it catered?"

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             TODAY'S RECIPE
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Exhaustive research over several decades has determined that there are
three basic methods for cooking sweetbreads: the fussy French method;
the casual Uruguayan (or Argentinean) method; and my method. Let's begin
by taking a look at the fussy French method.

To be completely fair to the French, this method is also practiced by
the Italians, Spanish, Germans, and... well, let's just say Europeans in
general. It involves several tedious steps before one even begins
cooking the sweetbreads. After the sweetbreads have been prepared for
cooking, they are almost always combined with other ingredients
(chicken, mushrooms, and artichokes are popular choices) and served in
some sort of sauce, resulting in a stew-like concoction. All such dishes
I have ever had have been very good, but any serious sweetbread lover
can't help but come away from such a dish wishing for more sweetbreads
and less other stuff.

The Uruguayans and Argentineans know how to cook sweetbreads. They are
an integral and necessary part of a good "asado," the South American
version of a mixed grill. They don't pamper and fuss over them, they
just peel away the toughest of the outer membranes and cook them over a
wood or charcoal fire until they're black on the outside and tender on
the inside. The skilled asador (grill master) knows that long, slow
cooking is the secret behind their casual method.

And then there's my own method, and I dare say it's a method that would
make any self-respecting French cook shudder in disbelief. Trust me, if
you are one of those people who like their bacon crisp, then you'll like
my method. Below are recipes for all three methods, and I hope you'll
try them all and let me know what you think.

The following recipe is adapted from "Mastering the Art of French
Cooking, Volume 1" by Julia Child, and it involves soaking, trimming,
and blanching or braising in order to begin making the dish. See why I
call this method fussy?

Fussy French Sweetbreads

For the soaking:
2-3 lbs (900-1350 g) sweetbreads
Cold water
Vinegar

For the braising:
4 Tbs (60 ml) butter
1/4 cup (60 ml) each finely chopped onion, carrot, celery, and ham
A bouquet garni made of 4 parsley sprigs, 1/4 tsp (1 ml) dried thyme, and 1 bay (laurel) leaf tied in cheesecloth
1 1/2 cups (375 ml) chicken stock
1/2 cup (125 ml) dry vermouth or white wine
Salt and freshly ground pepper to taste

For the sauce:
3 Tbs (45 ml) butter
3 Tbs (45 ml) all-purpose flour
1 1/2 cups (375 ml) heavy cream
1/2 lb (225 g) sliced mushrooms
Salt and freshly ground pepper to taste
Chopped fresh parsley for garnish

Soak the sweetbreads in several changes of cold water to which you have
added 1 tablespoon (15 ml) of vinegar per quart (liter) of water for 3
to 4 hours. Peel off as much of the tough, semi-transparent membranes as you can.

Heat the butter in a large heavy skillet over moderate heat and saute
the chopped vegetables, ham, and bouquet garni for about 10 minutes. Add
the sweetbreads and baste them with the vegetable mixture. Cook for 5
minutes, turn them over, baste again, and cook for 5 more minutes, until
lightly browned. Add the stock, vermouth, salt, and pepper and simmer
covered over low heat for 45 minutes. Let the sweetbreads cool in the
braising liquid and slice them into 1/2-inch (1 cm) slices.

To make the sauce, strain and reduce the braising liquid to about 1 1/4
cups (310 ml). In a separate pan over moderate heat, cook the butter and
flour for 2 minutes. Add the strained braising liquid and stir until
thick. Add the cream and mushrooms and simmer for 10 minutes. Adjust the
seasoning with salt and pepper. Replace the sweetbreads in the original
skillet and top with the sauce. Heat through and serve garnished with chopped parsley.
Serves 4 to 6.

In Argentina and Uruguay, the preparation of sweetbreads as part of an
asado is much more straightforward. Rather than giving quantities and
measurements, I'll just tell you how they do it.

Casual Uruguayan Sweetbreads

You can soak the sweetbreads as in the recipe above, but asadores rarely
do this. Simply peel as much of the tough semi-transparent membrane from
the sweetbreads as possible and place them on a grill over a hardwood or
charcoal fire. The tradition in South America is to place them near but
not directly over the coals because the fat dripping from the
sweetbreads (and there will be a lot of it) would create smoke and mar
the flavor of the sweetbreads. Cook slowly until completely browned
(almost black), usually about 45 minutes. If they cook faster than this,
place them farther away from the fire. Season only with salt before
serving. Serve with chimichurri sauce if desired (see below).

Finally, my method is the simplest of all, and I think it's the best.
Like the above recipe, it's all about technique so I'll just give the method.

The Chef's Sweetbreads

You can soak the sweetbreads as above if you want to, but it isn't
necessary. Peel as much of the tough semi-transparent membrane from the
sweetbreads as possible. Saute them in a little butter or olive oil in a
large cast iron skillet over moderate heat until deep golden brown on
both sides, about 30 minutes total cooking time. They should be crisp on
the outside and will render a great deal of fat. Season generously with
salt and pepper and serve with chimichurri sauce if desired (see below).

Chimichurri

1/2 cup (125 ml) olive oil
1/4 cup (60 ml) red wine vinegar
1/2 cup (125 ml) finely chopped onions
1/4 cup (60 ml) finely chopped fresh parsley
1 Tbs (15 ml) finely chopped garlic
1 tsp (5 ml) dried oregano
Cayenne pepper to taste
Salt and freshly ground pepper to taste

Whisk together the oil and vinegar in a bowl, and then stir in the
remaining ingredients. Let stand at room temperature for 2 to 3 hours before serving.
Makes about 1 1/2 cups.
Received on Mon Jun 15 18:50:38 2009