Wienerschnitzel

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             FOOD FUNNY
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Here's one as old as the hills. Thanks to Caryn for sending it in.

A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead
sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat
down, but lacks the nerve to talk to her. Suddenly she sneezes, and her
glass eye comes flying out of its socket towards the man. He
instinctively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back.

"Oh my, I am so sorry," the woman says as she pops her eye back in
place. "Let me buy you dinner to make it up to you," she says. They
enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they go to the
theater, followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her
deepest dreams and he shares his. She listens. After paying for
everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a
nightcap and stay for breakfast. They have a wonderful, wonderful time.

The next morning she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The
guy is amazed... everything has been SO incredible! "You know," he said,
"you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?"

"No," she replies. "You just happened to catch my eye."

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             TODAY'S RECIPE
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This dish goes by many different names in many different places. It is
practically the national dish in Uruguay, where it is called "milanesa."
Here in the U.S. it is usually known simply as breaded veal cutlet, but
in Germany and Austria it is "Wienerschnitzel" (or Wiener Schnitzel)
which translates roughly as "Viennese cutlet." It is best when made with
veal, but beef, pork, and chicken are almost as good, even if they aren't as authentic.

Wienerschnitzel

2 lbs (1 Kg) leg of veal, cut into slices 1/4 inch (5 mm) thick
1/2 cup (125 ml) fresh lemon juice
Salt and freshly ground pepper to taste
1/2 cup (125 ml) flour
2 eggs, beaten with 2 Tbs (30 ml) water
1 cup (250 ml) bread crumbs
6 Tbs (90 ml) lard (traditional), butter, or vegetable oil
Lemon wedges for garnish

Combine the veal slices and lemon juice in a non-reactive bowl and
marinate for 1 hour. Pat the cutlets dry and season with salt and
pepper. Lightly coat the cutlets with flour, then dip in the beaten egg
and coat with bread crumbs. Refrigerate for at least half an hour, or up
to several hours. Heat the lard in a large heavy skillet over high heat
until the surface shimmers and add the cutlets, 2 or 3 at a time. Cook 3
to 4 minutes on each side, until golden brown. Garnish with lemon wedges and serve immediately.
Serves 4 to 6.

The basic recipe for Wienerschnitzel has many variations in addition to the use of beef, pork, or chicken as mentioned above.

** Wienerschnitzel Variations **

Cheese Schnitzel (Kaseschnitzel)

Substitute 1/2 cup (125 ml) grated Parmesan cheese for half the bread crumbs in the recipe above.

Schnitzel a la Holstein

Prepare Wienerschnitzel as above and top each with a fried egg with anchovy fillets laid across the egg, and a sprinkling of capers.

Hunter's Schnitzel (Jagerschnitzel)

2 Tbs (30 ml) lard or butter
1 onion, finely chopped
8 oz (225 g) sliced mushrooms
1 1/2 cups (375 ml) beef stock
1 tablespoon cornstarch mixed with
1/2 cup sour cream
1 recipe Wienerschnitzel (see above)

Heat the lard in a skillet over moderate heat and saute the onion and mushrooms until lightly browned. Add the stock and simmer for 15
minutes. Remove from the heat and stir in the sour cream mixture. Spoon over the schnitzels and serve immediately.

Almond Schnitzel (Mandelschnitzel)

Substitute pulverized blanched almonds for the bread crumbs in the recipe for Wienerschnitzel above.
Alternately, top the Wienerschnitzels with slivered almonds that have been sauteed in a little butter.

Cream Schnitzel (Rahmschnitzel)

After cooking the Wienerschnitzels according to the recipe above,
deglaze the pan with 1/2 cup (125 ml) water. Mix together 1/2 cup (125 ml)
sour cream and 1 tablespoon (15 ml) all-purpose flour and stir this into the water.
Return the Schnitzels to the sauce and simmer covered - do not boil - for 5 to 10 minutes.

Paprikaschnitzel

Cook cream Schnitzel (above) but season the meat with paprika before frying and add 1 or 2 teaspoons (5-10 ml) paprika to the sauce.
Received on Fri Jun 12 09:03:10 2009