A Classic British Cookery Menu

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             FOOD FUNNY
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Thanks to Rosemary Zwick for this "from the mouths of babes" food funny:

After years of eating the wrong type of food I eventually went on a
strict diet and lost a great deal of weight. One day I was discarding
clothing from my wardrobe that no longer fit me. My seven-year-old son
was watching as I held up a huge pair of slacks. "Wow," I exclaimed, "I
must have worn these when I was 183."

My son looked puzzled, then asked, "How old are you now?"

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             TODAY'S RECIPES
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This dish originally went by the name of Welsh Rabbit, possibly because
cheese was often available when rabbits were not. It came to be called
Welsh Rarebit in the late 18th century, as it frequently still is, but
the correct designation is rabbit.

Welsh Rabbit

4 slices homemade-type white bread, trimmed of crusts and toasted
2 cups (500 ml) freshly grated sharp Cheddar cheese (approx. 1/2 lb, 225 g) combined with 1 Tbs (15 ml) flour
1/4 cup (60 ml) beer
1 Tbs (15 ml) butter
1 tsp (5 ml) Worcestershire sauce
1/4 tsp (1 ml) dry English mustard
A pinch of cayenne pepper

Combine in a heavy 2 to 3 qt (2 to 3 L) saucepan the cheese and flour
mixture, beer, butter, Worcestershire sauce, mustard, and cayenne
pepper. Cook over moderate heat, stirring constantly and not allowing
the mixture to boil, until it is smooth. Place the slices of toast in a
shallow ovenproof dish just large enough to hold them (you may use more
than one dish if you do not have one the right size to fit all four
pieces snugly) and pour the rabbit evenly over them. Place the dish
under the broiler for one or two minutes to brown the cheese lightly and serve immediately.
Serves 2 to 4.

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Cock-a-Leekie Soup

1 fowl (whole chicken, cut into parts)
1 doz. leeks (about 6 lbs, 3 kg)
1 lb shin of beef (use 1 lb (900 g) beef stew meat)
3 quarts water (3 L)
1 doz. prunes
Salt and pepper

After removing the marrow from the bone (you may omit this step if using
stew meat), put the beef on to boil in the water. Let it boil for 1
hour; then take 2 of the leeks, cut them up rather finely (make sure
they are thoroughly rinsed first), and add them, using only the white of
the leeks, and rejecting the green tails. Also add the fowl trussed
(skip the trussing if using chicken parts) for boiling.
   Let this boil for 1 hour longer; then cut up the remainder of the
dozen leeks into nice pieces, about 1 inch (2.5 cm) long; cut the leeks
right down the middle, and then across in inch pieces. See that they are
thoroughly washed. Add those and the prunes, and boil for another hour.
   The fowl may be taken out when ready, and probably it will take 11/2
hours to boil (ours should be done in 1 hour). Add the salt and pepper
to taste, and serve the soup.
   The fowl is sometimes cut up and served along with the soup in the
tureen (recommended), or it may be served separately.
Serves 10 to 12.

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Colcannon

6 medium-sized boiling potatoes (about 2 lbs, 900 g) peeled and quartered
4 cups finely shredded cabbage (about 1 lb, 450 g)
4 Tbs (60 ml) butter
1 cup (250 ml) milk
6 medium-sized scallions, including 2 inches (5 cm) of the green tops, cut into thin slices
Salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste
1 to 2 Tbs (15 to 30 ml) finely chopped fresh parsley

Boil the potatoes in lightly salted water until tender but not falling
apart. Drain and return them to the pan, set over the lowest heat
possible, shaking occasionally until they are dry and mealy. Meanwhile,
in a separate pot, boil the cabbage in lightly salted water for 10
minutes and then drain thoroughly. Melt 2 tablespoons (30 ml) of the
butter in a heavy 8 to 10 inch (20 to 25 cm) skillet over moderate heat,
and add the cabbage, cooking for a minute or two. Cover the skillet and
set aside. Mash the potatoes with a fork, potato ricer, or electric
mixer. Beat in the remaining 2 tablespoons (30 ml) butter, and 1/2 cup
(125 ml) of the milk. Add as much of the remaining milk as required to
make a smooth puree that is thick enough to hold its shape. Stir in the
cooked cabbage and the scallions and adjust the seasoning with salt and
pepper. Garnish with the chopped parsley on top.
Serves 4 to 6.

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So, what do you suppose those crazy Brits would call a pie made from steak and kidneys? How about...

Steak and Kidney Pie

1 1/2 lbs (700 g) lean boneless sirloin or top round steak, trimmed of fat and cut into 1 inch (2.5 cm) cubes
1 lb (450 g) veal kidneys, trimmed of fat and cut into 1 inch (2.5 cm) cubes
2 tsp (10 ml) salt
1 tsp (5 ml) freshly ground black pepper
1/4 cup (60 ml) flour
3 Tbs (45 ml) butter
1 Tbs (15 ml) vegetable oil
1 cup thinly sliced mushrooms (approx. 1/4 lb, 100 g)
1/2 cup coarsely chopped onions
1+1/2 cups (375 ml) water
1/4 cup (60 ml) pale dry sherry or dry red wine (optional)
2 Tbs (30 ml) Cognac or other brandy (optional)
1 Tbs (15 ml) finely chopped parsley
1/4 tsp (1 ml) dried thyme
1 tsp (5 ml) Worcestershire sauce
Puff pastry dough (recipe follows, or use a pre made puff pastry dough, or your own favorite pie crust recipe)
1 egg yolk combined with 1 Tbs (15 ml) heavy cream

Pat the cubes of beef and kidney dry with paper towels. In a plastic or
paper bag combine the flour, salt, and pepper, and toss the steak and
kidneys in the flour mixture to coat lightly but thoroughly. Heat the
butter and vegetable oil in a heavy skillet over high heat until it is
splutters. Add the cubes of meat and stir frequently, until they are
browned on all sides. Using a slotted spoon transfer the meat to a heavy
2 quart (2 L) casserole about 4 inches (10 cm) deep. Add the mushrooms
and the chopped onions to the skillet and cook over high heat, stirring
constantly, for 2 to 3 minutes. Transfer these to the casserole. Pour
the water into the skillet and bring to a boil, scraping the bottom and
the sides of the pan to dissolve all the "brown bits". Pour this liquid
into the casserole, and add the sherry or wine, brandy, parsley, thyme,
and Worcestershire sauce. Stir together gently.
   On a lightly floured surface roll the pastry dough into a rectangle
about 1/4 inch (5 mm) thick, and cut 2 strips about 12 inches long by
1/2 inch wide (30 x 2 cm). Lay the strips end-to-end around the rim of
the casserole and press firmly into place. Moisten the dough around the
rim with a pastry brush dipped in water. Drape the remaining dough over
the rolling pin and gently drape it over the casserole. Using a small
knife or scissors, trim off the excess pastry and secure the edges to
the rim by crimping tightly with your fingers or the tines of a fork.
Reroll the scraps of pastry and cut them into simple flower or leaf
shapes and apply to the top of the pie. Make three or four slits in the
top of the pie with a sharp knife and paint the surface of the pie with
the egg yolk and cream mixture. Bake in a preheated 425F (220C) oven for
30 minutes, then reduce the heat to 350F (180C) for an additional 30
minutes, until the crust is golden brown. Serve immediately, directly from the baking dish.
Serves 4 to 6.

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Making puff pastry really is a thankless task, but here is a standard,
easy-to-do recipe if premaid puff pastry is not available in your area.
Note that you may also use your favorite flaky pie crust recipe for this dish.

Puff Pastry

2 cups (500 ml) all-purpose flour
1/4 tsp (1 ml) salt
1/4 lb (1 stick, 113 g) unsalted butter, cut into 1/4 inch (5 mm) bits, thoroughly chilled
1/4 cup (60 ml) lard, cut into 1/4 inch (5 mm) bits, thoroughly chilled
4 to 6 Tbs (60 to 90 ml) ice water

Sift the flour and the salt together into a large mixing bowl. Add the
butter and the lard and, working quickly, use your fingertips to rub the
flour and fat together until the mixture looks like flakes of coarse
meal. Pour 4 Tbs (60 ml) of ice water over the mixture all at once and
gather the dough into a ball. If the dough crumbles add more ice water
until it will form a ball. Dust the dough lightly with flour, wrap in
plastic wrap, and refrigerated for 30 minutes.
  Place the dough on a lightly floured surface and press into a
rectangle about 1 inch (2.5 cm) thick. Dust a little flour over it and
under it and roll it out into a rectangle about 21 inches long and 6
inches wide (approx 50 x 15 cm). (Note: These dimensions are only
approximations. Once you do it you'll get the idea) Fold the strip into
thirds, forming a packet about 7 x 6 inches (18 x 15 cm). Roll the
pastry out again to the 21 x 6 size, and fold the ends over the middle
again. Repeat this process two more times. Wrap the pastry tightly in
plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least 1 hour. The pastry may be kept
in the refrigerator for 3 to 4 days before being used, and may be frozen for several weeks.

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Trifle

A piece of homemade pound cake about 5 inches (12 cm) long, 4 inches (10 cm) wide and 3 inches (7 cm) high,
or substitute a 12-ounce (330 g) packaged pound cake
4 Tbs (60 ml) raspberry jam
1 cup (250 ml) blanched almonds, separated into halves
1 cup (250 ml) medium-dry sherry
1/4 (60 ml) cup brandy
2 cups (500 ml) heavy cream
2 Tbs (30 ml) superfine sugar
Custard sauce (see below), chilled until firm
2 cups (500 ml) fresh raspberries, or 2 ten-ounce (280 g) packages frozen raspberries, defrosted and thoroughly drained

Cut the pound cake into 1 inch (2.5 cm) slices and coat them with the
raspberry jam. Place 2 or 3 of the cake slices, jam side up, in the
bottom of a glass serving bowl about 3 inches (7 cm) across and 3 inches
(7 cm) deep. Cut the remaining slices of cake into 1 inch (2.5 cm)
cubes, scatter them over the slices, and sprinkle 1/2 cup (125 ml) of
the almonds on top. Then pour in the sherry and brandy and let the
mixture steep at room temperature for at least 30 minutes.
   In a large chilled bowl, whip the cream with a whisk or a rotary or
electric beater until it thickens slightly. Add the sugar and continue
to beat until the cream is stiff enough to form unwavering peaks on the
beater when it is lifted out of the bowl. To assemble the trifle, set 10
of the best berries aside and scatter the rest over the cake. With a
spatula spread the custard across the top. Then gently smooth half of
the whipped cream over the surface of the custard. Using a pastry bag
fitted with a large rose tip, pipe the remaining whipped cream
decoratively around the edge. Garnish the cream with the 10 reserved
berries and the remaining 1/2 cup of almonds. The trifle will be at its
best served at once, but it may be refrigerated for an hour or two.
Serves 6 to 8.

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Custard Sauce

3 cups (750 ml) milk
4 tsp (20 ml) cornstarch (cornflour)
2 Tbs (30 ml) sugar
2 egg yolks
1 tsp (5 ml) vanilla extract

In a heavy 2 quart (2 L) saucepan, combine 1/2 cup (125 ml) of the milk
and the cornstarch, and stir with a whisk until the cornstarch is
dissolved. Add the remaining milk and the sugar, and cook over moderate
heat, stirring, until the sauce thickens and comes to a boil. In a small
bowl break up the egg yolks with a fork and stir in 4 to 6 tablespoons
(60 to 90 ml) of the sauce. Then whisk the mixture back into the
remaining sauce. Bring to a boil again and boil for 1 minute, stirring constantly.
Received on Tue Jan 1 22:08:25 2008