Grilled Ham Steaks with Bourbon Glaze

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            FOOD FUNNY
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Jules Maule-ffinch asks, "Does this count as a food funny? There's
a reference to fish." That's good enough for me.

Recently a routine RCMP patrol parked outside a bar just off the
main highway at Goobies, Newfoundland. After last call the officer
noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely
walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes,
with the officer quietly observing.

After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five different
vehicles, the man managed to find his car which he fell into. He sat
there for a few minutes and then threw a hook and line out the
window and seemed to be trying to catch a fish. A number of other
patrons failed to observe this crazy drunk as they left the bar and
drove off.

Finally the drunk started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it
was a fine, dry summer night) flicked the blinkers on, then off a
couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights.
He pulled in the hook and line and moved the vehicle forward a few
inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes
as some more of the other patron vehicles left.

At last, the parking lot was empty, he pulled out of the parking lot
and started to drive slowly down the road. The officer, having patiently
waited all this time, now started up the patrol car, put on the flashing
lights, and promptly pulled the man over and carried out a breathalyzer
test. To his amazement the breathalyzer indicated no evidence of
the man having consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the
officer said, "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to Headquarters.
This breathalyzer equipment must be broken."

"I doubt it," said the truly proud Newfoundlander. "Tonight I'm the
designated decoy."

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            TODAY'S RECIPE
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I almost always have a ham steak in my fridge for quick and easy
dishes such as this one.

Grilled Ham Steaks with Bourbon Glaze

For the glaze:
1/2 cup (125 ml) Kentucky bourbon
1/2 cup (125 ml) firmly packed brown sugar
2 Tbs (30 ml) Dijon-style mustard

1 center-cut smoked ham steak, 1 to 2 inches
(3 - 5 cm) thick

Combine the ingredients for the glaze. Grill the ham steak directly
over hot coals for 5 to 6 minutes on each side, basting frequently
with the glaze. Serves 4 to 6.
Received on Tue Jun 20 08:10:19 2006