Fettuccine with Smoked Salmon

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            FOOD FUNNY
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Thanks to reader Donna Walencikowski of Miami, Florida for this small
collection of groaners:

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my
electron." The other one says, "Are you sure?" The first replies,
"Yes, I'm positive.

An invisible waiter marries an invisible waitress. Their kids were
nothing to look at either.

I went to a seafood disco last week and pulled a mussel.

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly; but when they lit a fire
in the craft, it sank, proving that you can't have your kayak and heat
it too.

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            TODAY'S RECIPE
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I have dispensed with my standard format this week in order to bring
you a selection of main dishes based around dried pasta because I love
the stuff so much. Here is our lineup:

Monday's Entree
Fettuccine with Smoked Salmon

Tuesday's Entree
Rigatoni with Sausage and Peppers

Wednesday's Entree
Linguine with Squid and Garlic

Thursday's Entree
Shells with Tomato, Avocado, and Shrimp

Friday's Entree
Spaghetti with Capers and Olives

If you decide to add the salmon roe to this recipe, be sure to buy a
brand that contains no food coloring or it will run and ruin the
appearance of this dish. It's more expensive, but well worth the
additional expense.

Fettuccine with Smoked Salmon

4 Tbs (60 ml) butter
1/2 lb (225 g) thinly sliced smoked salmon, cut into thin strips
2 Tbs (30 ml) brandy (optional)
Grated zest of 2 lemons (about 2 tsp, 10 ml)
1 1/2 cups (375 ml) heavy cream
Salt and freshly ground pepper to taste
1 lb (450 g) fettuccine or other pasta shape, cooked according
to package directions and drained
About 4 Tbs (60 ml) salmon roe (optional)

Heat the butter in a skillet over moderate heat and add the salmon,
stirring to coat with the butter. Add the optional brandy, half the
lemon zest, and cream and bring to a simmer. Season with salt and
pepper. Add the cooked pasta to the skillet along with the remaining
lemon zest and toss to coat the pasta with the sauce. Garnish with
salmon roe if desired and serve immediately. Serves 4 to 6.
Received on Mon Nov 1 02:11:28 2004