Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Tue, 04 May 1999 08:53:42 -0400
:::::::::::::::::::::::: FOOD FUNNY ::::::::::::::::::::::::
This joke has been around so long I think it qualifies as a classic.
Thanks to Michelle Freeman for sending it in.
David received a parrot for his birthday. This parrot was fully grown
with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary. Every other word was an
expletive. Those that weren't expletives were, to say the least,
rude. David tried hard to change the bird's attitude and was
constantly saying polite words, playing soft music, anything that came
to mind. Nothing worked. He yelled at the bird, the bird got worse.
He shook the bird and the bird got more angry and exceedingly rude.
Finally, in a moment of desperation, David put the parrot in the
freezer. For a few moments he heard the bird squawking, kicking and
screaming and then, suddenly, all was quiet. David was frightened
that he might have actually hurt the bird and quickly opened the
freezer door. The parrot calmly stepped out onto David's extended arm
and said: "I'm sorry that I offended you with my language and actions.
I ask for your forgiveness. I will try to check my behavior...."
David was astounded at the bird's change in attitude and was about to
ask what changed him when the parrot continued, "...may I ask what the
chicken did?"
:::::::::::::::::::::: TODAY'S RECIPE ::::::::::::::::::::::
Here is an easy recipe that your mom is really going to like,
especially if you name it after her. When she asks what it is called,
just tell her that you named it "Avocado (put your mom's name here)"
and watch her smile.
Avocado Vinaigrette
1 whole ripe avocado per 2 people
Lettuce leaves for garnish
Bottled Italian salad dressing (or your mom's
favorite salad dressing)
Carefully cut the avocado in half using a sharp knife. Be sure to get
a grownup to help if you don't know how to use a knife. Remove the
seed and throw it away. Sometimes it helps to scoop the seed out with
a spoon. Place a couple of lettuce leaves on salad plates and place
an avocado half on top of the lettuce. Pour a little salad dressing
in the hole where the avocado's seed used to be. People will want to
eat this with a spoon, so make sure there are spoons on the table when
you serve this.
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.0b3 on Tue May 04 1999 - 09:00:03 EDT