Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Mon, 05 Jul 1999 10:00:29 -0400
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: FOOD FUNNY :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
There is nothing I like better than imported food funnies. This one
is from reader Hera Li from all the way over there in Singapore.
COOKING TERMS
Tongue: A variety of meat, rarely served because it clearly crosses
the line between a cut of beef and a piece of dead cow.
Yogurt: Semi-solid dairy product made from partially evaporated and
fermented milk. Yogurt is one of only three foods that taste exactly
the same as they sound. The other two are goulash and squid.
Recipe: A series of step-by-step instructions for preparing
ingredients you forgot to buy, in utensils you don't own, to make a
dish the dog won't eat.
Porridge: Thick oatmeal rarely found on American tables since children
were granted the right to sue their parents. The name is an
amalgamation of the words "Putrid," "hORRId," and "sluDGE."
Preheat: To turn on the heat in an oven for a period of time before
cooking a dish, so that the fingers may be burned when the food is put
in, as well as when it is removed.
Oven: Compact home incinerator used for disposing of bulky pieces of
meat and poultry.
Microwave Oven: Space-age kitchen appliance that uses the principle of
radar to locate and immediately destroy any food placed within the
cooking compartment.
Calorie: Basic measure of the amount of rationalization offered by the
average individual prior to taking a second helping of a particular
food.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::: TODAY'S RECIPE ::::::::::::::::::::::::::
This week we revisit one of my favorite themes - an international
menu. As much as I enjoy the ethnic menus this ezine has become known
for, I enjoy even more the challenge of putting together a menu that
represents as many different cooking traditions as possible. By
mixing and matching various cuisines from around the world, this menu
is truly a collection of World Wide Recipes. I call this collection
"A Trip Around the World."
The first stop in our "A Trip Around the World" menu is France, where
herbed mayonnaise is served with fresh raw vegetables. Try this
recipe next time you have a bunch of mouths to feed, whether at a
cocktail party or a summer back yard cook out.
Fresh Vegetables with Green Mayonnaise
1/2 tsp (2 ml) dry mustard
1 tsp (5 ml) salt
1 large egg yolk
2 Tbs (30 ml) lemon juice
3/4 cup (180 ml) vegetable oil
1/4 cup (60 ml) extra virgin olive oil
2 Tbs (30 ml) finely chopped parsley
1 tsp (5 ml) finely chopped fresh chives
1 tsp (5 ml) finely chopped fresh tarragon
Fresh vegetables for dipping, such as mushrooms,
cherry tomatoes, summer squash, cauliflower and
broccoli florets, green pepper slices, etc.
[Note: This recipe calls for uncooked egg yolk. If salmonella
contamination is a concern in your area then it is best to skip this
recipe. You may make an approximation of it by adding lemon juice and
fresh herbs to a commercially prepared mayonnaise.]
Combine the mustard, salt, egg yolk, and lemon juice in a 1 quart (1
L) mixing bowl. Add the oil a few drops at a time and beat with a
wire whisk until the mixture forms a thick emulsion. The remaining
oil can be added a teaspoon (5 ml) at a time while whisking
constantly. Mix in the chopped herbs and chill for at least one hour.
If the emulsion separates it may be reincorporated by whisking. Serve
with fresh raw vegetables. Serves approximately 8.
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