From Job Applicants

"From Job Applicants"*

**I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience.

*I have lurnt Word Perfect 6.0, computor and spreadsheat progroms.

*Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year.

*Wholly responsible for two (2) failed financial institutions.

*Failed bar exam with relatively high grades.

*It's best for employers that I not work with people.

*I Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.

*I was working for my mom until she decided to move.

*I have become completely paranoid, trusting completely
no one and absolutely nothing.

*I procrastinate, especially when the task is unpleasant.

*Personal interests: Donating blood. Fourteen gallons so far.

*Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain store.

*Note: Please don't misconstrue my 14 jobs as job hopping.
I have never quit a job.

*Reason for leaving last job: They insisted that all employees
get to work by 8:45 every morning. Could not work under those conditions.

*Finished eighth in my class of ten.
Received on Tue Mar 22 15:18:07 2011