Chemical Experiment

"Chemical Experiment"*

*A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 5th
grade class a lesson about the evils of liquor, so he
produced an experiment that involved a glass of
water, a glass of whiskey, and two worms.

"Now, class. Observe closely the worms," said the
professor putting a worm first into the water. The
worm in the water writhed about, happy as a
worm in water could be.

The second worm, he put into the whiskey. It writhed
painfully, and quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail.

"Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?"
the professor asked. Johnny, who naturally sits in back,
raised his hand and wisely, responded,

"Drink whiskey and you won't get worms."

***************************************************

"Curing Fears"*

*Shakey went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I've
got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there's
somebody under it. I get under the bed, I think
there's somebody on top of it. Top, under, top,
under ... you gotta help me, I'm going crazy!"

"Just put yourself in my hands for two years," said
the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I'll cure your fears."

"How much do you charge?"

"A hundred dollars per visit."

"I'll sleep on it," said Shakey.

Six months later the doctor met Shakey on the street.
"Why didn't you ever come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist.

"For a hundred buck's a visit? A bartender cured me for ten dollars."

"Is that so! How?"

"He told me to cut the legs off the bed!"
Received on Sat Mar 12 10:48:17 2011