Authentic Toast

"Authentic Toast"*

*A guy and a girl are having a drink together in a
bar. The man raises his glass and says, "Here's
hoping you're in Heaven ten minutes before the
devil knows you're dead!"

"What's that mean?" asks the girl.

"That," answers her date, "is an authentic Irish toast."

"Oh. Well, here's to bread, eggs and cinnamon."

"Bread, eggs and cinnamon? What's that?"

The girl says, "That's French toast."

***************************************************

"Making Friends"*

*A young teacher began a job as an elementary
school counselor and was eager to help. One day
during recess she noticed a girl standing by herself
on one side of a playing field while the rest of the
kids enjoyed a game of soccer at the other.

The teacher approached and asked if she was all right.

The girl said she was.

A little while later, however, the teacher noticed the
girl was in the same spot, still by herself.

Approaching again, the teacher offered, "Would you
like me to be your friend?"

The girl hesitated, then said, "Okay," looking at the
woman suspiciously.

Feeling she was making progress, the teacher then
asked, "Why are you standing here all alone?"

"Because," the little girl said with great exasperation,
"I'm the bloody goalie!"
Received on Thu Jan 13 20:23:20 2011