Election

"Election"*

*The politician was sitting at his campaign headquarters
when the phone rang. He listened intently, and after a
moment his face brightened.

When he hung up, he immediately phoned his mother
to tell her the good news.

"Ma," he shouted, "the results are in. I won the election!"

"Honestly?"

The politician's smiled faded. "Aw, Ma, why bring that up at a time like
this?"

*********************************************************

"Bronze Rat"*
*
A tourist walks into a curio shop in San Francisco. Looking
around at the exotica, he notices a very lifelike, life-sized
bronze statue of a rat. It has no price tag, but is so striking
he decides he must have it.
 
He took it to the owner: "How much for the bronze rat?"

"Twelve dollars for the rat, one hundred dollars for the story,"
said the owner.
 
The tourist gave the man twelve dollars. "I'll just take the
rat, you can keep the story."
 
As he walked down the street carrying his bronze rat, he
noticed that a few real rats had crawled out of the alleys
and sewers and began following him down the street.
This was disconcerting; he began walking faster. But
within a couple blocks, the herd of rats behind him had
grown to hundreds, and they began squealing.
 
He began to trot toward the Bay, looking around to see
that the rats now numbered in the MILLIONS, and were
squealing and coming toward him faster and faster.
 
Concerned, even scared, he ran to the edge of the Bay
and threw the bronze rat as far out into the Bay as he
could. Amazingly, the millions of rats all jumped into
the Bay after it, and were all drowned.
 
The man walked back to the curio shop.

"Ah ha," said the owner, "You have come back for the story?"
 
"No," said the man, "I came back to see if you have a bronze politician?"
Received on Mon Nov 8 15:17:39 2010