Helicopter

"Helicopter"

While practicing auto-rotations during a military
night training exercise a Huey Cobra screwed up
the landing and landed on the tail rotor.

The landing was so hard that it broke off the tail
boom. However, the chopper fortunately remained
upright on its skids, sliding down the runway doing 360s.

As the Cobra slid past the tower, trailing a brilliant
shower of sparks, this was the radio exchange that took place...

Tower: "Sir, do you need any assistance?"

Cobra: "I don't know, Tower. We ain't done crashing yet."

******************************************************

"Mechanical Problems"

The paper machine's speed controlled drive system
was down and the company was losing $10,000 an
hour in profits. They placed an emergency call to the
General Electric repair service, and since it was 3:00
am on Saturday night, the only repair man they had
available was old Charlie.

Old Charlie had been a repairman for 35 years and
was only two years from retirement. He had seen it
all and wasn't impressed by much.

As old Charlie pulled up to the guard shack at the
plant entrance, he was waved through and greeted
by no one less than the plant manager. "Thank
goodness you're here" he said "How long will it take you to fix it?"

Now Charlie had had nothing more than the sketchiest
description of the problem but he replied without
hesitation, "Oh about fifteen minutes."

"Great!" replied the plant manager, "My men will show
you where the drive controls are and get you anything you need."

After three hours of testing, reading prints, asking
questions, the drive system was still not working.

The plant manager became increasingly enraged and
accosted old Charlie, "I thought you said you
could fix this thing in FIFTEEN MINUTES!"

"I can and I will, " he replied, "As soon as I figure out
what the heck is wrong with it!"
Received on Thu Jun 3 20:49:15 2010