Double Genie

"Bilingual Lawyer"*

*A Mexican bandit made a specialty of crossing the
Rio Grande from time to time and robbing banks in
Texas. Finally, a reward was offered for his capture,
and an enterprising Texas Ranger decided to track him down.

After a lengthy search, he traced the bandit to his
favorite cantina, snuck up behind him, put his trusty
six-shooter to the bandit's head, and said, "You're
under arrest. Tell me where you hid the loot or
I'll blow your brains out."

But the bandit didn't speak English, and the Ranger
didn't speak Spanish. Fortunately, a bilingual lawyer
was in the saloon and translated the Ranger's
message. The terrified bandit blurted out, in Spanish,
that the loot was buried under the oak tree in back of the cantina.

"What did he say?" asked the Ranger.

The lawyer answered, "He said 'get lost, Gringo.
You wouldn't dare shoot me.'"

******************************************************

"Double Genie"*

*One day, a man rubbed a lamp.

A genie popped out of the lamp and said, "You
have three wishes. I will grant whatever you
wish for, but remember, every politician in the
world gets twice as much as you wish for, so be
careful what you wish for."

The man said, "That's easy! I want a million dollars."

A big pile of cash appeared in front of him. "Now,
each politician has two million."

The man said, "Never mind! I am happy as long
as I have my million. Now, I want a Mercedes."

A red Mercedes appeared in front of him and
the genie said, "Now, each politician has two of these."

The man was happier than ever. He thought
about his last wish, and said, "You know, I
have always wanted to donate a kidney..."
Received on Tue Jan 5 23:44:38 2010