Mow Better Blues

"Mow Better Blues"*
*
A preacher was making his rounds to his parishioners
on a bicycle, when he came upon a little boy trying
to sell a lawnmower.

"How much do you want for the mower?" asked the preacher.

"I'm just trying to make enough money to buy a bicycle,"
said the little boy.

After a moment of consideration, the preacher asked,
"Will you take my bike in trade for it?"

The boy said, "You got a deal."

The preacher took the mower and tried to crank it. He
pulled on the string a few times with no response from the mower.

The preacher called the little boy over and said, "I can't
get this mower to start."

The little boy said, "That's 'cause you have to cuss at it to get it
started."

The preacher said, "I'm a minister, and I can't cuss. It's
been so long since I've been saved that I don't know
if I even remember how to cuss."

The little boy looked at him happily and said, "Just keep
pulling on that string. It'll come back to ya!"

*********************************************************

"Bringin' Down The House"*

*A crumbling old church building needed remodeling, so,
during his sermon, the preacher made an impassioned
appeal looking directly at the richest man in town.

At the end of the sermon, the rich man stood up and
announced, "Pastor, I will contribute $1,000."

Just then, plaster fell from the ceiling and struck the rich
man on the shoulder.

He promptly stood back up and shouted, "Pastor, I will
increase my donation to $5,000."

Before he could sit back down, plaster fell on him again,
and again he this time he virtually screamed, "Pastor, I
will double my last pledge."

He sat down, and a larger chunk of plaster fell on his head.

He stood up once more and hollered, "Pastor, I will give $20,000!"

This prompted a deacon to shout, "Hit him again, Lord! Hit him again!"
Received on Sun Dec 26 11:08:59 2010