Woman's Gift

"Woman's Gift"*

*Whatever you give a woman,
        she will make greater.
If you give her sperm,
        she'll give you a baby.
If you give her a house,
        she'll give you a home.
If you give her groceries,
        she'll give you a meal.
If you give her a smile,
        she'll give you her heart.
She multiplies and enlarges
        whatever is given to her.
So, if you give her any crap,
        be ready to receive a ton of it.

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"Scented Candles For Men"*

*'62 Chevy truck - Interior and Exhaust
Gunpowder
Wet Dog (only if it's your own dog)
Frying Bacon (actually, a lot of different fried foods)
Wood Smoke
Chainsaw Exhaust
Freshly Caught Bass
Ozone (arc welder, of course)
Acetylene
Freshly Moved Dirt
Sale Barn
Silage
Sawdust
New Tires
Hot Metal
3 Year Old Cap
Quail Guts (shoot, ANY guts!)
Ammonia Fertilizer (light, of course)
Burning Grass or Leaves (not that 'pot' crap, either!)
Alfalfa
Firecrackers
Latex Paint
Received on Sat Jan 3 18:27:38 2009