Incredible Shape

"Incredible Shape"*

*You're in incredible shape," the doctor said.
"How old are you again?"

"I am 78." The man said.

"78?" asked the doctor. "How do you stay so
healthy? You look like a 60 year old."

"Well, my wife and I made a pact when we got
married that whenever she got mad she would
go into the kitchen and cool off and I would go
outside to settle down." the man explained.

"What does that have to do with it?" asked the doctor.

"I've pretty much lived an outdoor life."

*********************************************

"Useless"*

*The family had finally gotten their first dishwasher.
The father liked to inspect every new thing that
came into the house, so he stayed in the kitchen
and watched the display count down all forty-four
minutes of the dish-washing cycle.

Suddenly he called out for his wife, shouting,
"It's useless, the dishwasher is useless!"

The wife was amazed that the newest appliance
could be broken after only one use, but he insisted
that because they had a water softener, the
dishwasher was useless.

She decided to look for herself, and there it was,
on the inside door, next to the detergent dispenser:

"USE LESS WITH SOFT WATER"
Received on Wed Feb 11 07:39:18 2009