Geriatric Wedding

"Need a Push"

A married couple is awakened by the sound
of someone knocking on their door. The
husband gets up, opens the window, and
shouts, "Who's there?"

A voice from below calls out, "Please help.
I need a push."

"It's three in the morning," the man hollers.
"Get lost before I call the cops!"

His wife rolls over and says, "Honey, you
should help that person. Remember when
our children got stuck on the highway late
that night and that trucker helped?"

The guy sighs, goes downstairs, and calls
out, "Hey, do you still need a push?"

"Yes," a voice replies.

"Where are you?"

"Over here, on the swings!"

********************************************

"Geriatric Wedding"

George, age 92, and Edith, age 89, had been
seeing each other for 2 years when they decided
that life was too short and they might as well be
together for the rest of their lives. Excited about
their decision to become newlyweds, they went
for a stroll to discuss the wedding and what plans
need to be made. Along their way, they found
themselves in front of a drugstore.

George said to his bride-to-be, "Let's go in. I have
an idea." They walked to the rear of the store and
addressed the man behind the counter:

"Are you the owner?" asked George.

The pharmacist answered, "Yes, sir. How can
I help you?"

George: "Do you sell heart medications?"

Pharmacist: "Of course we do."

George: "How about support hose for circulation?"

Pharmacist: "Definitely."

George: "What about medications for rheumatism,
osteoporosis and arthritis?"

Pharmacist: "All kinds."

George: "How about waterproof furniture pads and
Depends?"

Pharmacist: "Yes sir."

George: "Hearing aids, denture supplies and
reading glasses?"

Pharmacist: "Yes."

George: "What about eye drops, sleeping pills,
Geritol, Preparation-H and ExLax?"

Pharmacist: "Absolutely."

George: "You sell wheelchairs, walkers and
canes?"

Pharmacist: "All kinds and sizes. Why all
these questions?"

George smiled, glanced shyly at Edith and
replied to the pharmacist, "We've decided to
get married and we'd like to use your store
as our Bridal Registry."
Received on Thu Jul 6 00:07:53 2006