Picking Lemons

"Picking Lemons"

The woman applying for a job in a Florida
lemon grove seemed way too qualified for
the job.

"Look Miss," said the foreman, "have you
any actual experience in picking lemons?"

"Well... as a matter if fact, Yes !" she replied.
"I've been divorced three times."

***********************************************

"Something In Common"

"You and your husband don't seem to have
an awful lot in common," said the new
tenant's neighbor. "Why on earth did you
get married?"

"I suppose it was the old business of
'opposites attract'," was the reply. "He
wasn't pregnant and I was."

***********************************************

"Missing Person"

A wife went to the police station with her
next-door neighbor to report her husband
was missing. The policeman asked for
a description.

She said, "He's 35 years old, 6 foot 4, had
dark eyes, dark wavy hair, an athletic build,
weighs 185 pounds, is soft-spoken, and
is good to the children."

The next-door neighbor protested, "Your
husband is 5 foot 4 inches, chubby, bald,
has a big mouth, and is mean to your children."

The wife replied, "Yeah, but who wants
HIM back?"
Received on Sat Jun 17 00:32:56 2006