Octogenarian Golfer

"Octogenarian Golfer"

An octogenarian, who was an avid golfer, moved to a
new town and joined the local Country Club. He went
to the Club for the first time to play, but he was told
there wasn't anyone with whom he could play because
everyone was already out on the course. He was pretty
insistent that he really wanted to play.

Finally, the Assistant Pro said he would play with him
and asked how many strokes he wanted for a bet. The
80 year old said, "I really don't need any strokes because
I have been playing quite well. The only real problem I
have is getting out of sand traps."

And he did play well. Coming to the par four 18th they were
all even. The pro had a nice drive and was able to get on
the green and 2-putt for a par. The old man had a nice
drive, but his approach shot landed in a sand trap next to
the green. Playing from the bunker he hit a high ball which
landed on the green and rolled into the hole! Birdie, match
and all the money!

The Pro walked over to the sand trap where his opponent
was still standing in the trap. He looked down and said,
"Nice shot, but I thought you said you have a problem getting
out of sand traps?"

Replied the octogenarian, "I do. Would you please give me
a hand?"

**********************************

"Golfer"

Tired of being a golf widow, a woman took up the game
and wound up playing with her husband on a country
course one day. He hit his drive way off into the rough,
behind a barn. She came over to take a look, surveyed
the situation, and suggested that if he opened both
barn doors he could hit his ball straight through the
barn to the green.

He saw this as an excellent idea, complimented her for
her suggestion, then opened the doors and stepped up
to the ball. He made a swing and great contact.
Unfortunately, the ball was off line, careened off the
door frame, hit the wife in the head and killed her.

Years went by, the man finally remarried, and this time
found himself a golfer for a wife. Incredibly, the same
situation occurs. The man is in the rough behind the
same barn. His new wife took a look at his ball and
suggested that he could make the green if he opened
both barn doors and hit through the barn.

"No way," he says. "I can't do that."

"Why not?" she asks.

"The last time I did that something terrible happened."

"What?" she asked.

"I got a double bogey."
Received on Thu Oct 28 11:35:29 2004