Bloodthirsty Critters

"Conversations of Three Pastors"

Three Pastors in the south were having lunch in a diner.

One said, "You know, since summer started I've been
having trouble with bats in my loft and attic at church.
I've tried everything -- noise, spray, cats -- nothing
seems to scare them away."

Another said, "Yeah, me, too. I've got hundreds living
in my belfry and in the attic. I've even had the place
fumigated, and they still won't go away."

The third said, "I baptized all mine, and made them
members of the church...
  . . haven't seen one back since!"
"Conversations of Three Pastors"

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"Bloodthirsty Critters"

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered
in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the
cave to get some sleep. Pretty soon all the other bats
smelt the blood and began hassling him about where
he got it.

He told them to go away and let him get some sleep
but they persisted until finally he gave in.

"OK, follow me," he said and flew out of the cave with
hundreds of bats behind him.

Down through a valley they went, across a river and
into a forest full of trees. Finally he slowed down and
all the other bats excitedly milled around him.

"Now, do you see that tree over there?" he asked.

"Yes, yes, yes!" the bats all cried in an excited frenzy.

"Good," said the first bat, "Because I sure didn't!"
Received on Wed Jul 21 10:05:00 2004