Living In The 00s

"Mirror, Mirror On the Wall...."
(It seems I cut off the ending.... A blonde moment, I guess...)

"Mirror, Mirror On the Wall...."

Legend has it that there is a bar in New York City
where, in the Ladies Room, there is a very special
mirror. If one stands in front of the mirror and tells the
truth, one is granted a wish. However, if one tells a lie,
*POOF* one is instantly swallowed up by the mirror,
never to be seen again.

A redhead of questionable looks walks into the Ladies
Room, stands before the mirror and says, "I think I'm
the most beautiful woman in the world."

*POOF* The mirror swallows her.

Next, a rather large brunette stands before the mirror
and says, "I think I'm the sexiest woman alive!"

*POOF* The mirror swallows her.

Later, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde walks into the
Ladies room, stands before the mirror and says,
"I think...."

*POOF*

******************************

"Living In The 00s"

You know you're living in the 00s when:

1. You try to enter your password on the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your
family of three.

4. You e-mail your mate who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that
they do not have e-mail addresses.

6. When you go home after a long day at work you still
answer the phone in a business manner.

7. When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally
insert a "9" to get an outside line.

8. Your company's welcome sign is attached with Velcro.

9. Even though you've sat at the same desk for 4 years you
have worked for 3 different companies.

10. Your CV is on a disk in your pocket.

11. You learn about your redundancy on the 11 o'clock news.

12. Your biggest loss from a system crash was when you
lost all of your best jokes.

13. Your supervisor doesn't have the ability to do your job.

14. Contractors outnumber permanent staff and are more
likely to get long-service awards.

15. Board members salaries are higher than all the
Third World countries annual budgets combined.

16. Interviewees, despite not having the relevant knowledge or
experience, terminate the interview when told of the starting salary.

17. Free food left over from meetings is your staple diet.

18. Your supervisor gets a brand-new state-of-the-art laptop with
all the latest features, while you have time to go for lunch while
yours boots up.

19. Being sick is defined as you can't walk or you're in hospital.

20. There's no money in the budget for the five permanent staff your
department desperately needs, but they can afford four full-time
management consultants advising your boss's boss on strategy.

21. Your relatives and family describe your job as "works with
computers."

AND THE CLINCHERS ARE...

22. You read this entire list, and kept nodding and smiling.

23. As you read this list, you think about forwarding it to your
"friends"

24. It crosses your mind that your jokes group may have seen
this list already, but you don't have time to check so you forward
it anyway.

25. You got this email from a friend that never talks to you
anymore, except to send you jokes from the net.
Received on Mon Jul 19 02:50:30 2004