Subject: Definitions of Cats
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Mon Jun 17 2002 - 05:53:35 EDT
"Definitions of Cats"
1. A lap-warmer with a built-in buzzer.
2. A four footed allergen.
3. A small, four-legged, fur-bearing extortionist.
4. A small, furry lap fungus.
5. A treat-seeking missile.
6. A wildlife control expert impersonator.
7. One who sleeps in old, empty pizza boxes.
8. A hair relocation expert.
9. An un-programmable animal.
***********************************
"Life Lessons Learned From A Dog"
1. If you stare at someone long enough,
eventually you'll get what you want.
2. Don't go out without an ID.
3. Be direct with people; let them know
exactly how you feel by piddling on their
shoes.
4. Be aware of when to hold your tongue,
and when to use it.
5. Leave room in your schedule for a good
nap.
6. Always give people a friendly greeting.
A cold nose in the crotch is very effective.
7. When you do something wrong, always
take responsibility (as soon as you're
dragged out from under the bed).
8. If it's not wet and sloppy, it's not a real kiss.
This archive was generated by hypermail 2b28 : Mon Jul 01 2002 - 00:00:01 EDT