Subject: Bible Salesman
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Sun Sep 30 2001 - 14:48:40 EDT
"Hiccups"
A man goes into a drug store and asks the pharmacist
if he can give him something for the hiccups. The
pharmacist promptly reaches out and slaps the man's
face. (Whack)
"What did you do that for?" the man asks.
"Well, you don't have the hiccups anymore, do you?"
The man says, "No, but my wife out in the car still does!"
***********************
"Bible Salesman"
This door-to-door entrepreneur became rather
bored with his job of selling Bibles, so he decided
to become a boss, hiring three people to sell Bibles
for him. He interviewed three people. The first came
in and said, "I want to sell Bibles for you."
"OK, you're hired. Here's your kit, go sell!"
The second came in and said, "I want to sell Bibles
for you."
"OK, you're hired! Here's your kit; go sell!"
The third came in and said, "I- i - I wa - wa- wa-want
t-t-t-t-to s-s-s-s-ell to sell, to sell, to sell, Bi - bi - bi -
Bibles, sell Bi -Bibles f-f-f-fo-for y-y-y-y you Bibles
for you!"
"No," shouted the man, "this will never work! You can't
sell Bibles for me!"
The applicant replied, "B-b-b-b-but I r-r-r-eall, but I really,
really, n-n-n-n-need th-th-th-this, really need tthis job!"
As there were no other applicants, he man said, "OK, I'll
give you one shot at this, but I expect you to PRODUCE!"
At the end of the can, the first applicant comes back and
reports, "I sold 8 Bibles today."
The second reports, "I sold 11 Bibles today."
The third worker reports, "To-to-to-to t-t-today, I-i-I so- so,
I so-, I so-, I so- I sold 28 Bi- bi- b- bibles!"
"Great," says the man. "However, I want you to sell a lot
more Bibles than that, so get out there tomorrow and
MAKE ME SOME MONEY!"
At the end of the first day, the first worker comes in and
reports, "Today, I sold 32 Bibles."
The second worker reports, "I sold 44 Bibles today."
The third worker reports, "To-to-to t-today, I-i-I so- so, I
so-, I sold 79 Bi-bi-bi- sold 79, sold 79 Bibles."
"Fantastic," said the man, "since you're doing so well,
so much better than these other two bums, why don't
you tell them what your sales technique is."
Replied the worker, "I-i-I j-j-j-j-ju-ju-ju-just wa, wa, wa,
just wal- wa- wa- walk, just walk up to up to up to just
walk up to them and and ask, them and ask, them and
ask if th-th-th-th ask if they w-w-w-w-w- wa- ask if they
want t-t-t-t-o-o- if they want to b--b-b-b-b if they want to
buy a Bi-bi - want to buy a Bi--b--a - a- abi - buy a to buy
a Bi-bi-bible, or d-d-d-d-d do th-th-they do they w-w-w-ant
me to READ it to 'em?"
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