Subject: Does Your Dog Own You??
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Wed Aug 29 2001 - 08:26:49 EDT
"Does Your Dog Own You??"
You believe every dog is a lap dog.
If you are cold, you put a sweater on your dog.
You have a picture of your dog in your wallet,
but not one of your kids.
You have your dog talk to your friends on the
phone.
You can't fully enjoy yourself without your dog.
No matter how large your bed is, it is not large
enough for you and your dog(s).
You spend more on clothes and food for your
dog than you do for yourself.
You believe there is no such thing as a naughty
dog.
When you need someone to talk to, your dog
is your first choice.
You sit on the floor if the dog got in the chair first.
******************************
"A Cat In Heaven"
The Scene: The Pearly Gates to Heaven.
St. Peter is receptionist at the entrance.
A cat shows up.
St. Peter says "I know you! You were a very
nice cat on Earth and didn't cause any trouble,
so I want to offer a gift to you of one special
thing you have always wanted."
Cat: "Well, I did always long to own a nice
satin pillow like my master had, so I could
lie on it."
St. Peter: "That's easy. Granted. You shall
have the satin pillow after you enter in."
Next, a group of mice appeared.
St. Peter: "Ah, I remember you. You were
such good mice on Earth. You didn't steal
food from anyone's house and never hurt
other animals. Therefore, I want to grant you
one special wish you always wanted."
The Chief Mouse replied, "Well, we always
watched the children playing and saw them
roller skate, and it was beautiful, and it looked
like so much fun. So can we each have some
roller skates, please?"
St. Peter: "Granted. You shall have your wish."
Next day, St. Peter is making the rounds inside
the Gates, and sees the cat. "Well, Cat...Did
you enjoy the satin pillow?"
Cat: "Oh, indeed I did. And say...that "Meals on
Wheels" thing was a nice touch, too!"
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