Subject: Arrangement
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Sat Nov 18 2000 - 09:58:01 EST
"Long Wait"
A guy was known among his friends to be
very brief and to the point - he really never
said too much. One day, a saleswoman
promoting a certain brand of brushes, knocked
his door and asked to see his wife, so the guy
told her that she wasn't home.
"Well," the woman said, "could I please wait
for her?"
The man directed her to the drawing room
and left her there for more than three hours.
After feeling really worried, she called out for
him and asked, "May I know where your wife is?"
"She went to the cemetery," he replied.
"And when is she coming?"
"I don't really know," he said. "She's been there
eleven years now."
******************************************
"Arrangement"
As the old man lies dying in the bedroom,
out in the parlor the family discusses funeral
arrangements. Son Gary says, "We'll make
a real big thing out of it. We'll have five
hundred people. We'll order fifty limos."
Daughter Grace says, "Why do you want
to waste money like that? We'll have the
family and maybe a few friends. One limo
just for us."
They proceed. Grandson Jeff says, "We'll
have lots of flowers. We'll surround him
with dozens of roses and lilies, dozens
and dozens."
Daughter Alice says, "What a waste! We'll
have one little bouquet, that's enough."
Suddenly, the voice of the old man is heard,
wafting weakly from the bedroom, "Why don't
you get me my pants? I'll walk to the cemetery."
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