Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Tue, 21 Sep 1999 05:30:27 -0400
"Irresistible"
Finding a bottle on the beach, Jake
uncorks it and releases a genie.
"Ah, now you get three wishes," says
the genie.
"Great!" Jake replies. "First, I want one
billion dollars."
Poof! There's a flash, and a paper with
Swiss bank account numbers appears
in Jake's hand.
"Next, I want a nice ocean-side house
in Hawaii."
Poof! Another flash, and he is holding
the deeds to an ocean side property
in Hawaii.
"Finally," Jake says, "I want to be
irresistible to women." Poof! There's
another blinding flash,
...and Jake turns into a box of chocolates.
********************************************************
"Real Friend?"
There were these three guys stranded
on a desert island. They'd been there
a long time, as they had plenty of food
and water, but no way off. One day a
big box drifted up to the shore. They
excitedly opened the box, only to find a
bunch of trash and old rags. At the
bottom, though, they found a magic lantern.
Remembering the story of Aladdin, they
rubbed the lamp furiously, and lo and
behold a genie popped out. The genie
was very glad to be out of the lamp and
agreed to grant each of the guys any wish
he may desire.
The first guy said, "You know, I was rich
and powerful back at home. I had a
multi-million dollar corporation, fast cars,
faster women. I jet-setted all over the world,
eating fine food, drinking fine wine, seeing
the world's wonders. My wish is to return
to the life I had."
POOF!! He disappeared.
The second guy said, "Well, I didn't have
what that guy has. I just had a job down
at the local gas station. But I have a
beautiful wife, three beautiful and wonderful
children - a really nice and fulfilling life. My
only wish is return to my home."
POOF!! He also disappeared.
Now it was the third guy's turn, "Gosh, I
didn't have a life at all like either of those
two. I'm not rich. I'm not powerful. I'm
not married. I'm not anyone's dad. I didn't
even have a job or a girlfriend. My life was
pathetic. The happiest days of my life
were spent right here on this island. You
know, my wish is for my two buddies to
come back."
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