Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Sun, 17 Oct 1999 10:56:59 -0400
"The Wedding Gown"
The Mother and daughter were shopping
for the girl's bridal gown. The Mother said,
"Thank goodness, I'll see you get married
in white." the Mother said.
"Why's that Mother ?" the daughter asked.
"Well dear, to be honest, only a virgin
should be married in a white gown;
otherwise, lavender is used."
"Oh!" replied the girl. "Well, how about a
white gown with lavender trim?"
****************************************************
"Wedding Vows"
During the wedding rehearsal, the groom
approached the pastor with an unusual offer.
"Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change the
wedding vows. When you get to me and
the part where I'm to promise to 'love, honor
and obey' and 'forsaking all others, be
faithful to her forever,' I'd appreciate it if
you'd just leave that part out." He passed
the minister a $100 bill and walked away
satisfied.
It is now the day of the wedding, and the bride
and groom have moved to that part of the
ceremony where the vows are exchanged.
When it comes time for the groom's vows,
the pastor looks the young man in the eye and
says:
"Will you promise to prostrate yourself before
her, obey her every command and wish, serve
her breakfast in bed every morning of your life
and swear eternally before G-d and your lovely
wife that you will not ever even look at another
woman, as long as you both shall live?"
The groom gulped and looked around, and said
in a tiny voice, "Yes."
At the reception, the groom leaned toward the
pastor and hissed, "I thought we had a deal."
The pastor put the $100 bill into his hand and
whispered back, "She made me a much better
offer."
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