Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Thu, 14 Oct 1999 10:43:41 -0400
"Tennis Elbow"
One day, Jeffrey complained to his friend,
"My elbow really hurts. I guess I should
see a doctor."
His friend offered, "Don't do that! There's a
computer at the drug store that can diagnose
anything, quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
Simply put in a sample of your urine, and the
computer will diagnose your problem and tell
you what you can do about it. It only costs $10."
Jeffrey figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled
a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug
store. Finding the computer, he poured in the
sample and deposited the $10. The computer
started making some noise and various lights
started flashing. After a brief pause, out popped
a small slip of paper on which was printed: You
have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water.
Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks.
Later that evening, while thinking how amazing
this new technology was and how it would change
medical science forever, Jeffrey began to wonder
if this machine could be fooled. He decided to
give it a try. He mixed together some tap water,
a stool sample from his dog and urine samples
from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he
masturbated into the concoction.
He went back to the drug store, located the
machine, poured in the sample and deposited
the $10. The computer again made the usual
noise and printed out the following message:
"Your tap water is too hard. - Get a water
softener.
Your dog has worms. - Get him vitamins.
Your daughter's using cocaine. - Put her in a
rehabilitation clinic.
Your wife's pregnant - twin girls. - They aren't
yours. - Get a lawyer.
And, if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis
elbow will never get heal."
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.0b3 on Fri Oct 15 1999 - 09:00:02 EDT