Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Sun, 03 Oct 1999 02:52:20 -0400
"Yankee Fan"
Gottlieb called his Rabbi and said, "I know
tonight is Kol Nidre (**), but tonight the
Yankees start the playoffs. Rabbi, I'm a life
long Yankee fan. I've got to watch the
Yankee game on TV."
The Rabbi responds, "Gottlieb, that's
what VCRs are for!"
Gottlieb is surprised. "Wow! You mean
I can tape Kol Nidre?"
*******************************************************
LadyHawke's Dictionary
** Kol Nidre is the first prayer of the Yom
Kippur Holiday. It is performed the night
before Yom Kippur. It is a very solemn
service and one of the most beautiful
from the pure musical point. It is also
a start of a 'sunset to sunset' fast. No
food, no water.
** Yom Kippur is the Day of Atonement.
** Simchas Torah - another Jewish holiday,
a joyous festival.
** Cantor - singer.
** shul - synagogue
*****************************************************
"Smiling Cantor"
It is the Kol Nidre service in Schul. As the
Cantor is singing, he notices through the
window that a young lady is undressing in
the house opposite the schul, and she has
not closed the curtains. As the service
progresses, the smile on the Cantor's face
gets bigger and bigger.
The Rabbi eventually says to him, "On such
a solemn night as this, why are you smiling?"
The Cantor replies, "In my heart, it is Yom
Kippur, but in my trousers, it is Simchas
Torah!"
*****************************************************
"Wishes"
Moishe and Sam have been at odds all year.
However, before Yom Kippur, they decide
to forgive each other for any unkind actions
and thoughts, as it is a custom on Yom Kippur
to do so.
"And," says Moishe, "I wish you, what you
would wish for me."
Sam yelled, "Are you starting again?"
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