Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Fri, 02 Apr 1999 11:52:35 -0500
"A Jewish Knight?"
Recently, Rabbi Jacobawitz, the chief rabbi of
England, was knighted by the Queen. As part of
the knighting ceremony, Rabbi Jacobawitz had
to kneel before the Queen, and as we all know
Jews do not bow before anyone except Hashem.
On top of that, he was told to recite a paragraph
from the Christian liturgy in Latin during the actual
knighting.
The Rabbi was in a quandary, as this was being
televised, but he could NOT violate the Jewish laws.
The five honorees were lined up waiting for the
Queen to receive them. As Her Royal Highness
entered the room all kneeled, except for Rabbi
Jacobawitz. The Queen noticed this, but
diplomatically ignored it. Then, the Queen began
knighting each person.
When she came to Rabbi Jacobawitz, who still
wasn't kneeling, she looked at him expectantly.
Realizing she was waiting for the Latin recitation,
he began to sweat and shake with nervousness.
Then, in a fit of utter desperation, he said the first
thing that came to mind,
"Ma nish tana haleilah hazeh!"
The Queen, perplexed, turned to Prince Charles
and asked,
"Why is this knight different from all other knights?"
~~~~~~~~~~
A bit of explanations for my non-Jewish subscribers:
Hashem is one of the permissible names Jews
can use to refer to G-d, not wishing to say His
name in vein.
"Ma nish tana haleilah hazeh" literally translated from
Hebrew "Why is this NIGHT different from all other
NIGHTS?" It is the first of the four questions,
traditionally asked by the youngest child during Seder.
Seder is festive meal during which the story of
Passover is retold. It is held on the first and second
nights of Passover. And boy, it's a long one!
Passover (Pesach) is a Jewish Holiday which
traditionally continues for eight days. It
commemorates the Exodus of the Jews from
their enslavement in Egypt.
Gosh, my explanations are longer than the joke...
I'll have to work on that..... I'll get back to juicier
jokes after the holidays. Have a happy!
***********************************************************
"Wrong Number?"
Late one Saturday evening, I was awakened by
the ringing of my phone. In a sleepy grumpy voice
I said hello. The party on the other end of the line
paused for a moment before rushing breathlessly
into a lengthy speech.
"Mom, this is Susan and I'm sorry I woke you up, but
I had to call because I'm going to be a little late getting
home. See, Dad's car has a flat but it's not my fault.
Honest! I don't know what happened. The tire just
went flat while we were inside the theater. Please
don't be mad, okay?"
Since I don't have any daughters, I knew the person
had misdialed.
"I'm sorry dear, "I replied, "but you've reached the
wrong number. I don't have a daughter named Susan."
"Gosh, Mom, "came the young woman's voice, "I
didn't think you'd be this mad."
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