Two friends meet in the street. One looked forlorn and
almost on the verge of tears. The other man said,
"Hey, how come you look like the whole world caved in?"
The sad fellow said, "Let me tell you. Three weeks ago,
an uncle died and left me forty thousand dollars."
"That's not bad."
"Hold on, I'm just getting started. Two weeks ago, a
cousin I never knew kicked the bucket and left me
eighty-five thousand free and clear."
"Hmmm... I'd like that."
"Last week my grandfather passed away. I inherited
almost a quarter of a million."
"Then how come you look so glum?"
"Well, this week - nothing!"
*********************************************************
"The Life Of Riley"
A new man is brought into Prison Cell 102.
Already there is a long-time resident who looks to be
100 years old.
The new man looks at the old-timer inquiringly.
The old-timer says, "Look at me. I'm old and worn out.
You'd never believe that I used to live the life of Riley!
I wintered on the Riviera, had a boat, four fine cars, the
most beautiful women, and I ate in all the best
restaurants of France."
The new man asked, "So, what happened?"
"Er... One day Riley reported his credit cards missing!"